Curiosity Saved the Cat

      I know what you’re thinking, I messed up the classic saying “curiosity killed the cat” and I’ll tell you what, I hate that phrase. Don’t get me wrong, I know that everyone and anyone can make some silly mistakes and get an undesired consequence, but why is it so bad to want to understand our world? For myself personally, I can turn the simplest thing into a whole investigation just out of curiosity. If something is broken, I want to research how I can fix it and why it broke in the first place. That sounds pretty practical, right? Why is it then that we have such a hard time asking important questions to some of the most intense parts of our lives? 

Thinking about getting married and if/when we want to have children are crucial turning points in our lives. The way we approach those relationships will make a world of difference. As we start to be more curious about these pressing topics, it’s important to pay attention to what sources we are getting our information from. I know that’s a pretty basic principle, but no seriously, ask all the questions possible regarding an article’s or journal’s legitimacy. For example, one could ask: When was this published? Would this date be a valid representation of current events? Who was the author? What sources did they get their insights from? What tests did they make or observe? What personal experience do they have?  The list could go on and on..

One of my favorite sayings is “knowledge is power”, and I wholeheartedly believe that. I’m a seeker of unbiased truth and I’ll be honest, it kinda sucks sometimes when I learn something that doesn’t align with what I believed before.. But what can I do at that point? Ask more questions! A lot of learning comes with being curious about ourselves and taking that moment to understand why we may feel a certain way. What events have happened in my life that may have drawn me to that conclusion? Based off this new learned concept, how comfortable would I be to adjust my mindset? What would I need to work on in order to get there?

Along with learning something new, if something we learn troubles ourselves, don’t ignore that feeling. Yes, a scholarly article can make some very convincing points, but no written statement can force you to believe it. We have to come to that conclusion ourselves. Authoritative statements can seem intimidating, but let’s be nice to ourselves, we aren’t obligated to now be passionate about it just because it is deemed official. At times, we might be hesitant to know more about something because we feel like the answer might bother us. It’s okay to be bothered by something and we can even use that to drive ourselves to ask why in order to understand that answer. One of the beauties in this world is the fact that all of us have the ability to make decisions for ourselves and adopt our own personal values. Not everyone is going to see things the same way one individual might, and that’s okay! Developing our values is a process that is very fluid. It makes little adjustments as we gather more information that sheds light onto pieces we might not have noticed before. It’s okay to not have all the answers. 

As we become more curious or develop values on our own, don’t be afraid to challenge them and implore about pressing issues! Make it a challenge to read about something that might even be a little controversial such as the complexity of same-sex relationships and how it could impact children. Another topic could be diving into cohabitation and how that could impact a marriage once that step is taken. The more we try to understand how certain things can affect your marriage and family life, we will be more prepared to take on some of the most challenging trials those relationships can go through. In fact, we can learn how to turn conflict into a bonding experience that will bring us closer together even in times when we are hurting. Being open and willing to seek guidance and understanding will strengthen our appreciation and admiration for one another. Life is always changing, so the questions should never stop coming!